Requiem For an Urge to Create

Wow. . . I've been pretty annoyed by my keyboard for the longest time on this old beast of a laptop. Absurd over use and just plain negligence had left the keyboard less than pristine. But thanks to the aid of cheap Ebay replacement parts, I now have a new keyboard, and I have returned to the actual desire to write.

Probably the other reason for wanting to return to writing has been the fact that I'm actually rested. I took a couple of sleep studies in the past 2 months. The first one was unpleasant. The second though was a completely different experience. 6 hours. . . 5 and a half hours of true sleep, I felt like I'd just slept for 12 hours straight. The difference was that they had me use a CPAP machine. OMG. Where the hell has this machine been all my life. I'd not realized that for the last decade or so I've been barely floating above rest this entire time. I just figured that being listless and having no energy were the norms. Now. . . It's a different light completely. I'm bouncy. . perky. . . I don't feel like ripping people's heads off. I actually feel like doing stuff. Ideas have been pouring into my head. I mean. . . damn. . . I am extremely satisfied with the results.

I do however feel like a fighter pilot every time I go to sleep, so if I ever wake up to the theme song to top gun, I'll know that Angie is making fun of me. . .:grin:

With the whole new outlook on life, I've decided to actually try my hand at NaNoWriMo month this November. I think I can honestly dish out a 50,000 word novel in a month. The wedding will be over and done with by then, and since I've been taking this quarter off of school. . . I can't think of a better way to spend my time.

I probably will post more often too, now that I'm actually able to type without my keyboard giving me annoying typos.

So I've decided to try this open office suite, and am trying to attempt to post a decent entry in the long forgotten, and rather dusty journal. Though my neglect isn't at all intentional. Really, there just hasn't been much going on lately. Oh I'm sure I could bore you with inundations that include my lack of normal sleep, but I think that would be rather boring. Still, recently I've take measures to actually try and fix this . . . Affliction? I guess that would be a decent descriptions. I recently submitted myself to a sleep study. The procedure was, in my opinion, the worst experience of my life. The cold room. . . the covers that appeared to have been tacked in to the mattress rather than tucked in. . . and the countless wires that were stuck all over my head, face, and legs . . not to even mention the tubeish thing that was covering my mouth and nostrils, made for a very very unpleasant day sleep.
I wasn't foolish enough to go into work that night, so I got quite a bit of time in Northerend. Go me. I did feel bad that I totally blew off gaming that night, but as I am usually brain dead during the Thursday gaming sessions, I probably helped the group, rather than hindered it.

Really. . The only time I feel truly rested is when I've been in bed for over 12 hours. Anything Short of that amount of time and I feel like the walking dead.

Speaking of which. . . I was the walking dead last weekend.

Olympia had it's own Zombie Walk . . . it was a friggin blast. My wonderful lady managed to gather the stuff we needed for the makeup and off we went to walk around the lack. . . We were nice enough to change the route at the last minute due to a Buddhist festival that was happening at the same time, so much fun was had.

We have pictures, but I haven't uploaded them yet. So I'll get those up when I get a chance.

We did manage to find time to actually hit the beach this month. I mean, summer doesn't last long so we had to take advantage of it. Though I am still disappointed that you need a wet suit to swim in this ocean without getting hypothermia but still, the beach being the beach, you still had some hard core swimmers. Despite the fog.
( Beach )

Crazy F****** if you ask me. I went bare foot, at first it was a “OOHHHOOLYFUUISCOLD” . . then it was . . “ooh. . It's not so bad”, but it was pointed out that it probably was hypothermia kicking in. Pfft. . . Details.

The whole trip was great, we finished it off with a trek to The Galway Bay Irish Pub & Bar in Ocean Shores. . Touristy, but it's still the best Irish Pub in the area. All in all . . Perfect Day.

This past Monday we went to Mount Rainier. DOODE, I thought the mountains around Tucson were huge, but man, this thing is a monster.

See! Monster! (yeah. . . we hit the gift shop/tourist center)

( Monster!! )

You would think that after Two years I would own up to the weather, but nope. . . I still wanted a long sleeved shirt this morning. I took some pictures of the fog rolling in. It's still gives me that “Oh it's sooo fake” feeling when I open my blinds and see the fog hugging the trees.

It's very pretty up here.
( Back Yard Fog! )

Well . . I've said enough. . .ciao for now.

I may have to do this in the far future. . . . . or not.

Evil Plan (tm)!

Your objective is simple: World Domination.

Your motive is a little bit more complex: Hatred for all mankind

Stage One

To begin your plan, you must first seduce a pope. This will cause the world to sense a grave disturbance in the force, overwhelmed by your arrival. Who is this despoiler of all that is good and nice and true? Where did they come from? And why do they look so good in a corporate suit?

Stage Two

Next, you must destroy united nations. This will all be done from a floating fortress, a mysterious place of unrivaled dark glory. Upon seeing this, the world will lose their minds, as countless hordes of the undead hasten to do your every bidding.

Stage Three

Finally, you must unleash your arcane ritual, bringing about an unending cacophony of screams. Your name shall become synonymous with fuzzy bunnies, and no man will ever again dare fire you. Everyone will bow before your mystical abilities, and the world will have no choice but to make you their new god.

Hatch your own evil plan:

http://www.darksites.com/evilplan.php

So it turns out that I'm not the only one on crack. Go fig

Oktapodi from Asım Varol on Vimeo.

Good morning.

Contrary to popular belief, damn it, it is morning. At the very least it’s morning somewhere. Still, this sadly doesn’t stop me from being completely exhausted. That’s one of main reasons of why it takes me friggin forever to actually update this thing.

I really do have a life.

Really. . . . I do.

:sticks tongue out at you all!!::

:cough:

Anyway.

Been pretty much just doing the school thing. I’m nearly hitting the burnout mark though. It’s amazing how working full time during the graveyard hours added with school make for a very psychologically icky situation. Not to mention sap any will to live you might have left. . . But it’s not all bad. At the very least I’m actually enjoying the fact that I am learning something out of all this. At least I am now.

I was on the mark when it came to my previous professor. Note, he’s a brilliant man, but his right brain teaching style tends to make me loose a synapse or two. (Which is hard for me since I’ve been running low on those lately :grin: )

Robert Ganns however is closer to the way I usually approach a subject. Namely ya know . . with . . . actually cracking open a book instead of talking about vampire dogs.
Don’t get me started on that again.

But on the whole, despite having an early class, and thus not chance of any social interaction with most of the brain-deadites, it’s not a bad experience. It’s been rather fulfilling not having the impression that I’ve been spinning my wheels and getting nowhere.

I’m still working at the same job that I got over a year ago. Good pay . . . . mind-numbing. . . and conservative co-workers. . . . . . :slams head onto desk: Needless to say I’m
looking for a promotion, if I’m going to get paid well for doing nothing on a Saturday night, I’d better be paid very well. :grin:

On a brighter note. We’re still saving money for our wedding in October. . . . which has meant that anything fun we do has to take a back burner to a lot of things. If that wasn’t the case I would have had a much better TV by now. My tv currently sucks. But that’s another gripe. As I was saying, we’ve had to take it easy on any place we go, but we still managed to take a trip down to Astoria, Oregon on Memorial Monday.

If you don’t recognize the name. . . you’re soo lacking any geek sense . . . it’s where they filmed Kindergarten Cop, Short Circuit, and THE GOONIES!!

Yeah. . . it’s still one of my favorite movies of all time. . . .

(for those of you laughing. . . . I have an army of snarfmonkies that I can sick on you)

But seriously Astoria is pretty, and I managed to see many of the landmarks.


( Astoria, OR )


Astoria should come with a disclaimer though. We managed to hit it on the most ideal sunny day, otherwise its cold cloudy and windy. But that’s most of Washington, so I was enjoying the sun while I had it.

On the way back we stopped by this fantastic Thai place in Longview. . . it was a very cool trip. I would like to go back and see cannon beach, but it was like another half hour down the way. Not happening with my back injury, but next time I'm soo there!!!

Yeah, lately I've just been feeling blah. Melanie (the front desk physical therapy assistant) tells me that it's probably just me not getting enough sleep. Oye! That has been the truth of my life lately. Last quarter, while only 3 short months, simply dragged. The cold winter, as well as the messed up sleep schedule due to school had me just plain grumpy.

I shocked the hell out of myself this past quarter. I managed to pass. I had a lot stacked up against me in my Math 140 class. Destacio turned out to be one funky old coot of a teacher. I should have known something smelled (other than him) when he didn't even show up for the first day. Ah well . . . today I started my first day of the spring quarter. Ganns is going to be tough. . . he embraces homework. . .I actually will have to crack the book later today. But it will be a nice change. Mr. D just didn't teach math the way I think. Ganns should be much much nicer.

More later when I feel less blah.

Well, I find myself having just completed an assignment that will be due in little more than half an hour. I began work on this assignment roughly 45 minutes ago. I know I should have more focus on an English Comp class, after all, writing is one of my favored hobbies right? But I find myself reeling from the realization that I find a perverse satisfaction in the whole "writing by the seat of my pants" bit.

It does seem a bit strange, but this practice of pulling out a paper or essay out of my ass on a tight deadline isn't an uncommon one for me. I remember having to run a campaign and forgetting my notes at home or somewhere else and having to literally dish out fantastic drivel to the masses and having them enjoy it. Deadlines are definitely a boon to my creative juices.

:Sigh: . . I'm so going to writer's hell.

Let me just say that the most viable contender for the weirdest feeling ever is trimming your nose hairs with an electric nose trimmer. It's just weird. . . but at least I can now breath normally. . . it was a jungle in there. . . :grin:

So now that I can smell, I can tell that the apartment really smells like barleyish beer. . . . My lady is going full throttle on the brewing for the wedding. She's going for a pumpkin porter. I applaud her. . . . she's got a whole lot more motivation than I do these days . . school . . work. . . physical therapy. . . and violin work and gaming don't count. ;)

At least since Saturday I've managed to catch up on sleep . . . I was hitting burn out with the lack of sleep. Stuff just piled on and got away from me for a bit there. . . . but I can still pull papers out of my ass like it's nothing and the test in math 140 was a snap. Logic. . . don't second guess yourself or you'll just frak yourself into a hole.

School was fun today. . . not the classes. . . . English comp has turned out to be my least favored class. . . math was the same page covered as yesterday . . (time moves backwards in that class) . . . no. . the fun part was trying to find my adviser. Turns out I didn't have one assigned. . . . when I did actually get one assigned. . . they gave me the wrong number for his office. . . they gave me the wrong building even. So after going back and waiting in the line that was threatening to make me rot there. . . I got the right building. . . but I didn't get an office number. I went to look for the building, and the new building isn't on the directory maps of the school so I had no clue where the fuck the building was. By sheer luck I found it on the exact opposite end of the campus (about 1/4 of a mile). found his office. . . by luck. . . and the bastard wasn't there. go. . me. :facepalm:

so lets see if I have more luck with email tag.

Hour 25. . . no sleep.

Homework. . . finished

studying. . . . need to study more.

work. . . . yeah. . I was there physically. Abstained from killing the kine.

Blood Coagulating in my caffeine stream. Must . . . get. . . more. . . . caffeine. . . .

Estimated time of sleep . . . hour 30. if lucky.

Not driving. . .

Back. . . in a man bra (back brace) . . . hurting only slightly. Ran out of drugs yesterday.

Movements sluggish . . . Mind state altering a bit.

Orion is talking to me.

Jinx is taking now . . .

Printer is now only printing in purple . . . w . .t. . .f. . .

So. . . my attempt to fight off the common cold has failed. Miserably. . . then again, it probably didn't help that I've successfully nerfed my immune system by running on exhaustion and not really eating all that much on a regular basis. Meh. . . I live.

So we get to find out the affects of taking alcohol with my muscle relaxants and Codine. woooo. . . if this lj entry goes wonky . . well . . it's a clear indication that yup . . I'm soo stoned.

So . . what's been going on with me. . . school . . . picked up the violin again . . . . and making a go of not spending a dime that I don't have to . . .

I think my math teacher might be dead. Can't actually be sure, but for the last few days he's canceled his classes. really. . .there is tears on the inside :attempts to hide the mariachi hat and margarita mix: . . . but seriously, I hope the old fucker is ok. . . he makes me laugh. Granted that might be the Codine talking, but I do enjoy his math class more than my English Comp class. Which I think is actually turned into a marketing class . . .

Used a Christmas gift card to pick up Violin for dummies. . . . :grin: . . we'll see how that works.

and yeah. . .wedding is in 9 months and counting. . . woot!

I've decided to take my lady's last name since my name really doesn't mean a whole heck of a lot to me. . .the reaction I've been getting at this is just . . . odd. . . I'm not sure I understand the big deal.

Despite the foggy weather, I've been unable to drag the lethargic feeling away from my sorry carcass. I am exhausted. I sorely just want to crawl into bed, but I still have 2 classes ahead of me. At least coffee is plentiful and my classes are not taxing just yet. So I should be able to get some rest if I practice a little discipline. My back injury and the drug cocktail that my doctor has me on may have a lot to do with my stupor. Muscle relaxants, two different pain medications. . . oh yeah. . . Codine is da debill!

But I digress.

Life's been on the fast track to getting back to normal. I'm finally getting the chance to recover from the holidays. My spirits wouldn't be so out of sorts if I hadn't had a few disappointments this weekend. Went to Powell's down in Portland this weekend. . . HUGO bookstore that would make every Bookman's store look like a stall down at the swap meet. I tried to get rid of some of my "inherited" books. . . . failed.

meh. . no biggy right?

also had a small relapse on pain this weekend. . . a 4 hour ride in a car didn't help, but the trip and seeing some friends from Tucson that moved up here rocked.

Oh. . . yeah. . . my laptop monitor died. I'm hoping it's the inverter board, if that's the case. . cheap ebay fix. . . if not. . . . <- cry.

We'll see.

for now. . wow. . . will not be in my future till I either get a monitor or the laptop fixed. . . but at least my wonderful lady has allowed me the use of her old laptop. . . so . . Yay. . I won't be cut off up here.

still . . if you need to contact me . . my cell is 360-589-9975 . . send a txt. . . you'll get a response quicker. . . I have a bad habit of keeping the damned thing on silent. :grin:

Ganked meme from verdaera's lj. . .

1. Who was your FIRST prom date?
Sadly had to avoid proms in general. Strict parents were the suckage . . . plus I had a social disease at the time. . . Catholicism


2. What was your FIRST alcoholic drink?
Dirty water . . . had a couple of bud-lights at age 14 at an ECS event.


3. What was your FIRST job?
:grin: . . I worked at Great American Cookie at El Con Mall. Back when it still had a bit of a heart beat. It wasn't a bad job, but after a while I got soo sick of cookies.

4. What was your FIRST car?
1968 Oldsmobile Vista Cruiser Station Wagon. . . Pepe . . My little mule! . . Car was pretty much birth control on wheels and had more colors on it than Bondo made. . . but man did it have what counts under then hood. My dad originally built the engine for stock drag racing, and man did it have a punch. Of course. . . I could literally see the gas gauge move towards the empty side when I slammed on the gas, but I could leave a corvette in my dust off the line.

5. Who was the FIRST person to text you today?
Gallant.

6. Who is the FIRST person you thought of this morning?
My first and last thoughts are of Angie.

7. Who was your FIRST grade teacher?
Hell if I know. . . I know my favorite teacher was my 4th grade teacher . . Mr. Withers.

8. Where did you go on your FIRST ride on an airplane?
Oklahoma to visit my folks. . . kinda exciting and very much a let down at the same time. . ^_^

9. Who was your FIRST best friend, and are you still friends with him / her?
Alberto. . . best buds with him when I was 9. . . I heard he still lives in Tucson. . . but I haven't heard from him since I was 14

10. Who was your FIRST kiss?
Define kiss? :grin: . . . my first kisses in memory were when I was 6 years old and I was playing a kissing game with an older woman . . of 7 years of age. The first real kiss that counts was with an amazing woman at my first Estrella. If you're not rocked to your core . . you're not kissing right. . . :) sadly. . never went further than that one kiss. . . and to this day I never knew her name nor have I seen her again.

11. Who was the FIRST person you talked to today?
Angie

12. What was the FIRST thing you did this morning?
Drowned myself in a hot hot hot shower.

13. What was the FIRST concert you ever went to?
KISS on their "We're out of money and need more booze" concert. It was fun. . . it's not every day you get to see the TCC fire marshal throwing a fit.

14. What was your FIRST tattoo or piercing?
all natural for now.

15. What was the FIRST foreign country you went to?
Mexico

16. What was the FIRST movie you saw in the theater?
Back to the future 2

17. When was your FIRST detention?
Never got caught.

18. What was the FIRST state you lived in?
Illinois. lived there till I was six.

19. Who was the FIRST person to really break your heart?
Tiffany. . . . a high-school crush. . .

20. With whom was your FIRST date?
Trina. . . lol . . had to sneak out of my parents house to do it. . . gods were they pissed off afterwords.

21. What was your FIRST pet?
Parakeet named George.

22. Who was your FIRST roommate?
Megan. . . Gods that was a psychotic mind job

23. Who was your FIRST love?
Define love. I've fallen many times in lust. But if I have to define love with the relationship I am in now. . . I'd have to say Angie. Only one other has come close.

24. What was your FIRST screen name?
First and last. . . Nicodeamos

25. When did you have your FIRST baby?
I'll let you know in a couple of years. m'kay.

Well . . . . snowed in. Yup . . . you read that right . . I am currently snowed in. Olympia has been hit with a winter snow storm. ZOMG!! it's fuuuunn!! My back yard has a hallmark feel to it:





And here's a candid moment . . .





But all this fun does come with a price. . .my butt is sore. . . . a group of new friends . . . some thin plastic and a hill of snow. . . equals SLEDDING!! but also pain afterwards . . . but . . I did learn one thing. . . SCA BOOTs RULE!!

^_^

Oh. . . side note . . I made pretzels today. . . never let them rise after you shape them. . or you get mini pretzel loafs.

:head banging: . . .

This  makes  so  much  sense. . . I had wondered  why there were no new Tweety  cartoons . .

I smell something evil brewing here. . . .

:snorts!!::